Monday, October 29, 2012

It's Fine!

I know you're going to think I'm a bit loony, but this past weekend I came to a huge revelation. All day Saturday I really buckled down and got done things that needed to and a few that didn't. I was proud of myself. I even got up early and went to the YMCA where I had a good workout for my normal. On Sunday I was ready to start part 2 of the big to do about everything around the house. Well, guess what! I realized, it didn't really matter!!! That was huge. Overall our home was clean and peaceful, food was cooked and all was fine.I realized that what hadn't been done would either be there when I got back to it or some of my other family members would take care of it. So on Sunday, I jumped in bed and watched old DVRed recordings. When I was done with that, I went to Netflix and I capped my day off by reading some Deepak Chopra!!! I don't think I've ever had as relaxing a Sunday as I did yesterday. As I got ready for work this morning, I realized that all was fine!!!

Friday, October 26, 2012


 It's my favorite time of year, but I've yet the opportunity to sit outside, drink a cup of coffee and take in all the beauty. I haven't even had time to go home and see my mom and brother and really get to take a break from my fast lane life. I love to read, but I think in the last month, I've only completed one book and it was short. I have some organizing that has been a goal of mine for months now that is still unorganized. I just can't seem to get things done.

What is it exactly that I've been doing to occupy my time so? A whole lot of absolute nothing. It's like I lose hours doing that very well. When time elaspes and I look at the clock, I am bewildered. I just can not believe I spent three hours just sitting. I wasn't deep in meditation or thinking any kind of grand thoughts. I just was sort of out of it. I most often find myself like that when I get home from work. I make it in the house around 5:15. The next thing I know it's 7 or 8! I must admit in that time of being lost, I manage to pop out a meal, straighten up a little or some over simple task, but I used to get so much more important to me stuff done. Now there's no other way to put it, I'm just lost! I guess I describe the being lost feeling as simply not aware of things. It's like I'm in an area of thoughtlessness (is that a word?). I know routines will sometimes get a person out of sync, but it is not like that. It's hard to explain.

I just look forward to getting out of this area. I have started writing down a list of daily goals that I want to accoumplish to help me do that. I also have ended my relationship with Directv as I've found tv to suck up time too.We'll see how it goes for a couple of weeks and if I will be able to relinquish my dvr. We'll see!!!

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Just Say No - To stress

I've always been the type to see good in all people. My husband tells me of how he wishes I didn't see the good always - how he wishes I could just get and stay mad at a person. I think we all, despite how bad  we may or may not be, have good in us.

This way of thinking helps me in all of my relationships I think. My husband has won many arguments just because I had no desire to argue nor a desire to win them. Others have called themselves victorious also. I learned years ago, even before my diagnosis, about what stress can do to a person with MS. I can't control many things, but I can control what stresses me.

I do get upset and bothered at times. Those are the times I draw closer to God. I think of the oh so many times he could have gotten angry at me, washed his hands with me. and just thrown me away. If he can do it, then so can I. The next time you see troubled - Just Say No!!!

Friday, October 5, 2012

She lives!

       Good morning everyone! I am alive and doing well. There's been a whole lot going on in the last few months. I said I'd better get back to blogging in search of some much needed sanity. It provided such a great relief for me. How could I be gone so long. It was sometime in April that I last posted anything? Anyway, I am back now. I've had some ups and downs with my health over the last few months. I'm up now and thankful to God for that. I'm still working. My family welcomed the addition of a sweet little girl who's guardian died of cancer. We've endured losing her to her biological mom who is a crack addict and only looking to receive the benefit from Social Security that the little girl was receiving. DSS is working to get her back to our home. This process has definitely taught me something about time. I used to complain about not having enough time. I learned that we make time for things that are important to us. That revelation has enabled me to look at things differently. I'm glad to be back and sorry for the long delay.