Accomplished!!!

I did it people!!! I joined the YMCA!!! I am so enthusiastic about what this means for me. Everyone who knows me knows that I am an all or nothing type person. I don't like to do anything a little or less than. I think since I have joined and made the first appearance (this morning), I am going to take an all or nothing approach here for a while until I can make a habit out of it. It was terribly hard getting out of bed this morning, but I did it. I liked it. When I first got there I went to the wide open area where the pros were. Not a good idea at all. I felt like a failure amongst them so I went to this little small isolated area with only about seven or eight pieces of equipment in it. I was the only one there. I was a little unsteady on my feet as I am always am thanks to our good friend MS. However, I didn't allow that to be a stumbling block for me today. I held on tighter and kept on moving. I finished all seven pieces of equipment in that area and even went to the weights area for a little while. What was so good for me was the fact that I saw people of all shapes and sizes coming through the door. There were several business people who came there dressed to work out and left dressed in their business attire. I loved it. I didn't plan on showering there and leaving as I wasn't planning on working up a sweat, but boy did I ever. It was my first day there, but everyone made it feel as if it was my 101st. I truly enjoyed it and can't wait to get back. I am even thinking of going back after work. I only worked out for about 25 minutes this morning. If I go back, I think I could do another 25 minutes or even make it a total of an hour for the entire day. We all know how MS works when we are moving, so perhaps going twice a day for 30 minutes each time will be a way to trick it! Wish me luck!!!

This Cold!!!

I have a head cold. It started late Sunday evening. I went to bed totally fine except for a few sniffles and woke up as if a Mack truck had hit me. I still made it to work and worked my full eight hours. The same thing this morning. It's as if I stood in front of that same Mack truck in the wee hours of the morning and waved it to come on and hit me. It's amazing to me how I used to be able to do almost anything through a simple head cold. I mean what was a little congestion! Now I realize the cog fog worsens whenever I am being attacked by a cold and also that my entire body seems weaker. I try to stay away from colds and any kind of sickness really, but it never fails. It could be worse I guess. I could be coughing and feeling achy too while enduring a relapse so I am not complaining - just making an observation of how a simple cold turns things around for me now. Is it just me or do you feel the same way?

Sleep

I remember a time when I could go to bed at 2 a.m. and be awake by 5 a.m. I would go through the entire day full of energy and could and would oftentimes do the very same thing the next night. That is not the case anymore. I love sleep. If I go to sleep by 10 p.m., I find myself still struggling to get up at 6 a.m. I try to take a nap whenever I can also. There is something about the experience of shutting down or turning myself completely off, even if only for a few minutes. It always seems as if  I wake up rejuvenated and ready to tackle whatever may be ahead. I remember being in kindergarten and after lunch each day we were made to take a nap. I think that should still apply even in the workforce. I remember an old employer who would take a nap each day for about 30 minutes. He said it increased his productivity. Of course I thought, well why don't you allow your employees to do the same thing. Of course again I didn't say anything. A lot of the medication I have taken in the past and some that I take now have drowsiness as a side effect. I hear many people complain about it, but I take whatever I am supposed to and deal with the side effects. It took a minute to get here I must say.  There could be side effects that are much worse than drowsiness in my book. I remember being a little girl and my mom crying one night because her Tizanidine made her sleepy and she didn't want to go to sleep as she had done many times previously. She tried to fight it, but found herself nodding off. This is what caused her the tears. She wanted to spend time with the rest of us, but just couldn't stay up. Of  course, she eventually had her doctor put her on something else. For me, my family knows already that when it's time to take certain medication, it won't be long before I make the trip down the hall. I love sleep and be it medically or naturally induced, bring it on. I went out and some time ago and made purchases to make my bedroom and place of enjoyment for me. I got new pillows, a couple of really nice comforter sets (with the nice sheets) some aromatherapy and nice curtains. When I enter my bedroom now no matter how hard I try sleep is unavoidable, but I love it and wouldn't have it any other way. I wish I could take a nap right now!!!

What's My Motivation

 Good morning! I have added a daily calendar reminder to blog for a few minutes each morning. I also have added a reminder to go walking for 30 minutes and to spend time praying each morning. I have long ago started the reminders and every single day I find myself dismissing them to never be accomplished. It is so hard to find time to do those type things, but it is so not hard to get caught up in "The King of Queens" or "The Voice" on television. I always seem to feel a bit better after I blog and after I walk. You would think I would do more of both. Where are my priorities, right? I am making it a priority starting tomorrow morning to get up a little earlier to do those things. It is not cold for January here so you would think I would be really enjoying the outdoors. I need your some so please hold me accountable! Ask me how it's going! I also have been meaning to join my local YMCA. It is only minutes away from my job. I could easily work and then get off and go workout for at least 30 minutes. Right? Right? Ok so I am going to get up early enough tomorrow morning to write, walk and spend time with God and then make it to the YMCA to joing. That's the plan. I'll let you know how it goes!!!

I'm Back

Good morning! I am back. I have been away for some while now. It was not intentional at all. It seems that I have been busy, but ask me what it has been that kept me so busy and I wouldn't be able to offer you an answer. I am doing pretty well healthwise. I am taking the daily injection of Copaxone and functioning pretty well. I do some days forget to take it. You would think with something being such a huge part of my life, I could never forget it. Some days are just jammed packed for me. I stopped school yet another time to just regain some focus in a couple of areas - mainly career. Thankfully I have regained it and will be signing up for classes again soon. I feel good and am in a good place in the areas of spirituality, home and career. I am working on me - being a better version of me. In doing so I have decided that health and well-being is important. God is so good to me. He has been for my entire life! I need to be more and do more. I can be more and do more. It's funny how it doesn't even take much to make a difference in someone else's life yet for so long the only lives that I made a difference in was mines and those close to me intentionally.  Finances and savings are also important to me now more than ever. I have a lot on my mind as you can read. I am back!

Watch What You Say To Me!

The words of others make an incredible impact on one's life. I’ve always heard how we should be mindful about the things we speak over ourselves because there is power in our words. I’ve read scripture in the Bible about it even. I try to be very mindful of such. However, when others say things, we have no control over them. Just the other day a coworker of mines spoke some words to me and I am still yet, a couple of days later impacted by them.

It was Monday and I was having a good day. I resolved to look at Mondays as the blessing that they are some time ago as opposed to “Dreadful Monday.” I had a bounce in my step (even though it was a little too far off to the right – balance issues). I was going through my day in a wonderful way. I passed by her office and she and I started a conversation. She mentioned the fact that I could be having more relapses here lately because I was trying to do too much. I mentioned the fact that if I started doing less, I would begin to feel ill more often according to past times. I think part of the reason that I am able to still do as much as I do in spite of MS is because I WANT to do it. I think sometimes there is a mental component to any diagnosis. Her comment caused a whirlwind of thoughts to flood my mind and they still do. It made me question what I it exactly that I am actually doing. Am I making a great effort at being great or am I making a bad attempt to make things look as if they are okay when they are in fact not so okay? Should I be home in bed or at least relaxing and not worrying about the day to day stress of trying to do my job in order to make my life easier? Could my health be in a better condition if I stayed home and lived off of social security disability benefits? These are all questions that flood my mind right now. All of it started with a few well intentioned (I hope) words of a coworker. She said them and probably had forgotten them just as soon as she said them, but they stick with me still yet – even today. I just wish we could censor what others put out. I know I have the personal choice of how I let what others say impact but, but just to be able to require others to think about even simple statements they make would be awesome.

MS Did It!!!

I recently found myself explaining a mistake I made by using my Multiple Sclerosis (MS) diagnosis as the blame. I think it is easier to blame things on MS than to just deal with any other causes. I mean I forgot because I have all of these lesions on my brain some of which are active right now as we speak makes me feel so much better. I never wanted to become the person that justified things because of something else. I get disappointed at times when others do it and yet here I was doing it. I forgot to get my paperwork from your office, just because I have a million other things on my mind would have been more of a true statement than for me to blame it on MS which may or may not be the actual cause. I came home and went straight to bed because I wanted to as opposed to I do have MS and some days just don’t have any energy left may not go over as well with my family. I ordered take-out for dinner because I didn’t want to dirty up my kitchen tonight does not sound as nice as I think I am having a flare up. Now I honestly don’t fake MS symptoms and if it truly feels like I am in a flare I will let my family and friends know it. I just didn’t want to be that person that told all that she is enduring to others as an explanation of my shortcomings. I am glad that most of those around me know a good bit about MS and the fact that it sometimes does cause things to go awry. So from now on I am making a conscious effort to not blame it on MS!